unfiltered passions

My friend Dave wrote a script in high school for a thesis for end of grade 12 something.... and one of the lines in the script I will always remember. Something deep to write in grade 12, a quote that I use on occasion.

"Alcohol is a catalyst for unfiltered passions" -my friend Dave

The above photos do not represent the meaning of that quote. I just really like the quote. These photos are my attempt at creating beautiful photography. I am borrowing my boyfriends fathers 1976 Minolta X-700 SLR camera for the rest of the summer. I enjoy taking photos and I find beauty in almost everything. Little things in life amaze me.... like last night on the drive from Toronto to my small hometown there was a ridiculous summer thunderstorm. It rained so hard we pulled over into a KFC parking lot, and waited about 10 minutes for the rain to die down a bit. It was only 8:45pm but it looked like 11pm. The sky was so dark. When the rain cleared you could see a strip of sky peeking out from underneath the black. The dark sky looming over intensified the sunset, which was butter yellow, contrasting with the dark blue clouds above it. As the sun set further there were pinks and greens and yellows mixing together. I asked my mom to pull over to the side of the highway where I wasted about half of the film.

new post, new domain

So.... the time has come. I would like to officially change the name of my blog. Pocket thoughts.... you had a good run, but you were kind of spur of the moment name. It takes me a long time to decide on names for things. I started my list of potential names for my (not yet born) children. The one that has been on the list the longest, and will stay is Evelyn. I love everything about that name, it is so feminine, and graceful. Anyway, the real purpose of this post, the new name of my blog.... (are you excited?!)

super pomme

If you take the time, no matter how often that may be, to read my blog, please do not forget to change the address and save it as: www.superpomme.blogspot.com

In other news, I was in Montreal last Sunday to Wednesday. I went with a best friend of mine. It was kind of a last minute trip, and I enjoyed (almost) every minute of it.

What I liked: Being with my dear friend, seeing a friend from Paris and him being kind enough to host us, delicious breakfasts, champagne, falling asleep in parks, buying knit finger puppets (hours of fun), my Minolta camera, cats, mannequins, neighbours, roommates, red wine, sunny days, cobblestone streets, nutella espressos, rosé, bixi bikes, homeless men in fountains, climbing up Mount Royal wearing kitten heels, practicing my French, sleeping on a super comfy mattress, guacamole, patio re-arranging (feminine touch), my beautiful m0851 wallet, romantic summer night rain, seeing Montreal from a rooftop, getting photo tips from a sexy/grumpy French photographer, laughing fits.

What I didn't really like: 8 hour bus rides, sunburn, camera running out of film after just two photos on the rooftop, stomach pains, being too drunk and confused to eat "apparently" delicious poutine, waiting 20 minutes for a train to pass, being too tired and sick to enjoy the "bring your own bottled wine" restaurant the first night.

I hope that I have time to visit these patios this summer.
http://www.torontolife.com/features/best-city-hit-deck/

sometimes my computer is just so lame it changes normally fast songs slow. and i hate that

bloor

Yesterday


I heard beautiful and inspiring jazz music

I tasted apricot beer and a homemade salad of tomatoes, fresh radishes, dill weed, mushrooms (all Canadian veggies) and balsamic vinegar.

I saw something inspiring and a little bit startling.

I touched the tires of my bike and found the back one to be flat.

I smelled birthday candles on my way home on Bloor street at 2am.

les films d'été 09

I don't really go to the cinema very often, or watch movies very often for that matter. And when I do it is normally with my boyfriend. I never know the names of actors, or the name of the film. I never seem to have watched the popular movies that everyone and their dog have seen. I will laugh at different parts then everyone, and fall asleep during the climax (especially in an action film with lots of guns and yelling).

But,

these films are giving me butterflies already, and I haven't even seen them yet. I really want to see them.

L'heure d'été looks like everything I imagine a French family to be. I have spent enough time with my boyfriend and his family (in France) to see that the French really do live like this. It is beautiful, and tempting and makes me so badly wish I were French. Brunches at the summer house, grass, beautiful architecture, sunshine, rain, rose, champagne.... ahhhh to be French! I am so happy that I can be a part of it. Yes, this film is a must see. Plus I love Juliette Binoche.

This was a mysterious book to me when I was a child. I was reading it right around the time when I was beginning to see the difference between reality and make believe. I loved it. The images, the ideas....it was all so familiar. But there was something about it that scared me a bit. Not the monsters, but more about make believe and growing up. I remember doing a school project on it, when I was about 9. We were supposed to choose a children's book and create something with it that we would present to younger children. I chose this book and made puppets with Popsicle sticks and a little replica of Max's bedroom. And they chose the Arcade Fire's song to play with the trailer. I remember first hearing Arcade Fire on much music one day, which I rarely watched. I was in the kitchen making a snack and had the tv on and suddenly I heard beautiful music. It was Rebellion (Lies) that I heard first. I sat and waited until the song ended so I could see who this beautiful new band was. 10 minutes later the whole album was downloaded and I had found myself some high school *memory portals. Sometimes their music gives me shivers. Beautiful.

I am a romantic. There is no doubt about it. I feel everything. I am emotional. I love love. So of course I loved Audrey Niffenegger's novel. I devoured the book. I was sad when it ended because I wanted to read more. Now there is a movie. I hope it doesn't disappoint me.

*memory portal:

A "Memory Portal" is something I've made up. It is a sensation that brings you back to a place in time, somewhere, anywhere, anytime in your life. It is not deja vu. For example, the smell of gasoline often reminds me of my grandparents shed. Seeing an old t-shirt reminds me of hanging out in Loblaws with my friends in high school. Black and white gingham reminds me of me and my mom when I was a baby. The memory portal can be any of the five senses. It can be good or bad. But it is a portal that triggers something in your memory of a moment in your life. Finding memory portals by chance are one of my favourite things.

country roads

During the month of July, I was renting out an apartment at College and Spadina. Before that one of my dear friends offered me a place in her apartment for the summer. This is was perfect because I was almost positive that I would only be staying in Toronto for 3 months. And her offer saved me having to go to the trouble of finding a place to sublet. The only condition was that we share her bed. Which is actually not a problem at all. I knew it wouldn't be. The only problem was when my boyfriend back in Paris and I started to miss eachother like crazy. So I searched like crazy on craigslist for a week and found a perfect place for us, at College & Spadina. He had lived in Toronto during one semester of studies at OCAD about 2 years ago. He wanted to come back and see Toronto in a different light. Different season, different age, different circumstances.... We had so much fun while he was here. The days leading up to him coming seemed so long! And then the days leading up to him leaving seemed so short. It's something that is so good, and you know that it is going to end, and you just really don't want it to. But it does. And so life continues to give you gifts, and take them away.... temporarily. I am so in love. It gives me butterflies still.
We went to my parents house for a few days to visit small town and country life. I grew up in a small town a few hours from Toronto. So did my mom, and my dad. And my grandparents.....
I left home for college the summer after high school graduation, I was 17. Since then I have not gone back for more that 2 weeks, more than a visit. I love my family, and it's nice to get out of the city for a few days, but I don't see myself living there.

I wanted my boyfriend to see my roots, my family, the first 17 years of my life. But I was quite nervous. I thought, how can this boy who has lived in Paris, France his entire life possibly enjoy himself in this small town? Lo and behold, he did. Who knew spending the day on my uncle's farm would be such an excellent thing to do?

The wonderful day was composed of four-wheeling, mud puddles, cows watching, mosquito swatting, kittens, kayaking in ponds, beer drinking in the forest, beer drinking by the barn, beer drinking by the drive-way, beer drinking by the pond, my uncle falling into the pond, dog's chasing four-wheelers, sunset, splashpants, spaghetti with marshmallows, bunnies, warm rain.... this helped me appreciate more where I came from.

I used to be bored by things like that, or make up excuses to my dad when he would invite me to come to his brothers farm. I look back and feel so lazy and disappointed for not appreciating the beauty and pleasure that could be found so easily around me. But this day was different, I am older and have traveled and seen more of the world, I have experienced 10x more than what I ever could have imagined. And so I was seeing this small town, my history, in a completely different light. I prefer this light. I will keep that day in my memory.

It's the kind of wonderful day that you think of often. Little moments from it pop into your head every so often and put a smile on your face, or even laugh out loud a little. But also make you a little bit sad, because it can't be repeated. It was too perfect to replicate. I know these types of days very well, and consider myself lucky. It was one of those days that was just so full of energy and movement and wonderful conversations, that by the end of the night you are so exhausted from the constant excitement, that all you can do is sigh, and smile, and have one of the best sleeps you have had for a long time.

the dirt in your fries.

I have been listening repeatedly this. I. Can't. Stop. And watching it. That kiss, when they are at the dump. It melts me.

But that's ok, because I guess I will soon have it memorized, which will be helpful because I am also learning to play it on the guitar. I have so much free time on my hands.... I am trying to so hard to keep myself occupied. Because if I don't I will think. And every time my mind wanders I just think about love. And how much I miss mine. I left it in France. I left a lot of things in France. Some books, some bras, some jewelry, and the love of my life. Kissing goodbye in airports is the hardest thing to do. I played up the moment for weeks before it happened. What would the last words I say to him be? How long would we kiss. Would I cry? Would there be people watching? Would I care? What would his mouth taste like? What would mine taste like? ....And then the airline I was flying with fucked everything up, by not processing my online payment, meaning I was not actually listed as a passenger on the plane. So my last moments with him were spent with a quick but meaningful kiss, and many many tears (on my end), and his father standing waiting to go home. Then I rushed through the gates so I wouldn't miss my flight.

Let me explain how the airline owes me $756.00 Canadian.
No, let me rant.

So when I arrive at the airport for about the 100th flight of my life I go to check-in as always. Never had a problem before. She takes my online print-out and my passport, and says nothing but says "excusez-moi un moment".... and goes and makes a phone call. I'm sweating and swearing and asking my boyfriend and his dad to eavesdrop. They can't hear her. She comes back and says that I am not listed as a passenger on the plane. So sends us up to the airline office, to get in a long line just to deal with someone who is clearly not interested at all in my problem. She says the payment didn't go through. And I say yes it did, I saw it on my Mastercard bill. "Desolee Madamemoiselle...." So I had to buy another damn ticket and she said don't worry they will refund you. You see, if I didn't make this flight, it meant that I was illegally staying in the country because my Visa expired that day. And if I stayed past that day it would ruin my chances of getting another visa. So ya....it's been four weeks and I'm still waiting for my $756.00

Some good news!!!!

I am going to be a student of Archeology and Art
History at La Sorbonne in Paris, France in September!

I am so excited and so relieved. All of the studying I did for the language test in February and March paid off.