tiny dancer

I am sorry dear blog for neglecting you these past few days.
I just had a very stressful and emotional week. The week was basically just a series of small things that built up to an explosion of me listening to Tiny Dancer and bursting into tears. I can't explain it, but this happens to me occasionally. If I'm feeling a little down because of circumstances, and someone says something, or happens, or I hear a song, I can easily start sobbing. And then after a good cry I feel exhausted, but refreshed. And now, I am listening to Tiny Dancer free of tears. My week included cell phone breaking, alarm not working, late for work, cold bedroom, questions about where my future was going, money, pain in my foot, being completely lost in translation with 5 year olds, me crying in a restaurant.... and the list goes on I'm sure, that's just all I can think of right now. My host mom/boss knew that I had passed a tough week and was so sweet to me. She let me finish work for the day today at 14h. And when she went out today to buy her girls dresses for New Years she bought me a beautiful dress for New Years also. I adore her. She has made me feel so at home here in Paris and I am so grateful for all she has done for me. She has really made me feel like part of the family.

And now I will list some positive events from the week. Homemade tarte aux pomme, sketching, warm sweaters, new cell phone, homemade pizza, red wine, in depth conversations, warm hugs, new found music, the Christmas lights of Champs Elysees, the Christmas window displays of Galeries Lafayette, princess picnics on the kitchen floor.

As strange of a week as it was, I feel quite content right now. I've decided that right now the best way to be always happy is to just enjoy the moment and stop thinking about what I am doing next weekend, what I'm doing next month, if I can't stay in France to study etc....

Galeries Lafayette

Champs Elysees & a festive ferris wheel

if i don't get my socks on right

(dirty Keds, camera malfunctions, Paris 2008)

I was listening to Regina Spektor tonight and re-realized how amazing she is. I would really like to meet her one day. I saw her live last year in Toronto, and she had a great stage presence; the way she spoke, what she spoke about, how she sang. It was clear that there is so much of her personality in her songs. I was listening to "carbon monoxide" last night, and was trying to figure out the lyrics, so I looked them up.

(all-you-can-eat at Sushi Island, blurry photo, 2008)

"Carbon Monoxide"

Carbon monoxide
Soon I'll go to sleep
If I don't got my socks on right
They slide right off off my feet
As I walk-a, walk-a, walk-a, walk-a, walk-a, walk-a, walk....


(Ted Leo and the Pharmacists concert 2007)

Carbon monoxide
As I take you home
The first time I get my socks on right
But I don't have a gas mask on
As I walk-a, walk-a, walk-a, walk-a, walk-a, walk-a....
Walk you home
Yeah
I'm so cool, I'm so cool, I'm so cool

Come on daddy [x8]


(Sleeping vagabond.... not sure why I took a photo. Toronto 2008)

Carbon monoxide
Soon we'll go to sleep
No one will notice we're gone
Cause we don't have a job to keep
They'll just say that we're being lazy
Sex crazy, sex cra-zazy
They'll just say we're living our whole life in bed
And we'll be in bed but we'll be oh so very much
Dead-a, dead-a, dead-a, dead-a, dead-a....
Yeah
But we're so cool, we're so cool, we're so cool
Dead-a, dead-a, dead-a, dead-a, dead-a....
Dead
But we're still cool, we're still cool, we're still cool


(walking in a back parking lot near Kensington Market, Toronto 2008)

Come on, come on, come on daddy
Come on daddy, come on daddy....
Come on, come on, come on, come on

Carbon monoxide [x2]

(one of the first days of Spring 2007. A park in Toronto by Union
Station.....the name of the park escapes me.)

Only Regina Spektor could sing "come on daddy" 50 times and "dead-a" and "walk-a" in a song and still make it sound beautiful.

These photos are all really bad, I know. But I am running out of space on my hardrive and have been doing some major deleting of photos. Before removing them completely by emptying the recycle bin I double checked to be certain I wasn't deleting any good photos. Anway, these are the photos I rescued. They are not very good, but for some reason I deemed them worthy of staying on my computer.

(Lucy from the first filming of
"the Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe".
1970 something I suppose.)

another delicious reason to never leave france

Tonight my friend/french-english conversation partner and I went for dessert at Chez Justine. He has impeccable taste in restaurants; great ambiance, not too expensive, and great food and drinks. We ordered chocolat chaude, (dark chocolate of course), and fresh whipped cream. Let me tell you, how the French have a very different concept of "a hot chocolate". They are quite literally made of HOT chocolate. Please take your time imagining.... thick and creamy, just melted dark chocolate, with cream added to it. Then topped with fresh whipped cream and sprinkled with dark cocoa. Yes, this is for real. No cheap North American packages of hot chocolate mixed with water. I was telling my friend about this over messager last night and had her drooling on her keyboard.

my friend - fish
me - cat

fish says:
yummmmmmm
fish says:
i watched a show once where they talked about french hot chocolate and it looked amazing! that sounds sooooooo friggen good
cat says:
this accompanied by tarte au pomme (apple pie) with buttery fresh pastry and mmmm apples topped with real french vanilla ice cream (not chapmans)
cat says:
and a glass of red wine
cat says:
we are going here when you come to paris.
cat says:
and when i visit you we will make real hot chocolate
fish says:
ohhhhh my
fish says:
that sounds sooooooo good
fish says:
my mouth is actually salivating
cat says:
mine too, and i already ate this tonight

le fin

Chez Justine
96, rue Oberkampf - 75011 Paris
Métro Menilmontant/ Parmentier.

I don't think I would last very long back in Canada before going through delicious-French-food and beautiful-bar withdrawal. (and also beautiful-French-boyfriend withdrawal too).

how to look incredibly un-french and other pieces from a carefree friday

salut les pote!

(that translates to something like "hi-ya folks!" in english).
I would never actually walk up to a group of French people and say that (a second time anyway....).

Re-cap of the week time! I worked 12 hour days both Wednesday and Thursday taking care of 3 children, with occasional visits from their friends. Needless today.... je suis très fatigue. But my boss is incredibly kind, and gave me Friday off. Merci beaucoup! Friday was spent sleeping in until a well deserved 12:30. The only reason I actually woke up was because I was staying at my boyfriends, and he had class at 13h. Otherwise I think we both could have continued sleeping straight through to the next day. It's winter, it's our natural instinct to hibernate, no? I went to Rue de Rivoli to search for some possible Christmas gifts to bring back to Canada for Christmas, but didn't have a lot of luck. I did however by a scarf for my mom (and a pre-christmas gift scarf for myself, it is warm, wooly, navy blue and plaid; my favourite things). And guess who I passed while walking down the street!? Starbucks, looking all tempting and full of chai tea lattes. So of course I entered, and bought one for myself. Even after my craving earlier in the week with the cupcakes I had no time to splurge on one, so this one tasted even more beautiful. It was Christmas in my mouth. Spicy, warm and exactly what I needed. Most of the tables were full, so I said to myself, no worries, I will take this cup of cosy with me while running my errands. This was a mistake. Never have I received so many anti-tourist glares from Parisiens. Never. Even on my trotinette, even speaking English loudly with my friends on the metro, even hanging out with a group of French people and foring them to speak English because my French was so terrible! Even then, it was accepted. But walking down the streets of Paris with a to-go coffee on hand, that is unacceptable. The French are so keen on sipping away on their coffees for hours, or atleast downing their espresso at the bar. They even carry around meter long baguettes, carelessly taking bites off the end of it. And these things are both completely acceptable? But not my coffee carrying? Maybe they were even more offended because I was dressed quite Parisien that day.
In the end, I didn't care, I happily sipped my coffee all the way from boulevard Sebastopol almost to Place Concorde.

It was a pleasent afternoon, really.

Later that evening I went out for some drinks and dinner with my boyfriend and his 6 other friends. It was actually a very enjoyable night, me being the only girl amongst 6 French guys. The night began at Chez George for a few glasses of wine. We then migrated a few streets away to El sol et Luna, a Mexican restuarant where I had an avacado quasadila and we all shared pitchers of margarita. After dinner we then found ourselves at a cosy bar with French musicians singing classic English music.... their adorable French accents singing anything from Radiohead to Pink Floyd. At this bar we switched to beer.
It was a very fun night, and I spoke French almost the entire time!! The night began at 6:30 and we didn't arrive home until after 2.
This morning when I woke up my stomach was quite disappointed with me for the assortment of foods and drinks I consumed that past night: wine, quasadila, margarita, beer.

cupcakes & flill

Flill
is a word that just came into my head today. It doesn't mean anything but I just thought the word. That happens to me sometimes, is that weird? Probably. So I searched the word on Google and found this. This is such a good idea, if only it worked. I was really excited when I first realized what it was, but was then disappointed to find that it wasn't very entertaining. If I ever happen to find myself with some spare time after completing my long life list of things to do, then I will create a much better version of this idea. Flillustrator.

In other news, prepare yourself when looking at the following photos and recipe. If you happen to like chai as much as I do, then you will probably be baking these sometime this week. Or atleast craving a chai latte, or chai tea. A nice frothy creamy chai latte sounds delightful right now, but in Paris, those are few and far between. And by that I mean, I suppose I will make a quick stop at Starbucks tomorrow. Shame on me, but this is a chai-emergency.

I have just found the most delicious website. A website entirely of everything cupcakes. I have always loved cupcakes. The shape, the taste, the creativity; a perfect little personal dessert. If you don't like sharing your desserts, then cupcakes are the ideal dessert. I don't mind sharing. When I make these I will definitely be sharing.... if I can manage the recipe.

Chai Spice Mix

2 teaspoons fennel, whole
2 teaspoons cloves, whole
1 tablespoon cardamom, ground
2 teaspoons cinnamon, ground
2 teaspoons ginger, ground

1. With a small food processor, grind up the whole fennel and cloves.
2. Transfer to a small bowl and add remaining spices. Mix to combine.


Chocolate Chai Spice Cupcakes
24 regular cupcakes / 350 degree oven

200 gram bar of Valrhona 61% cacao
3 sticks butter
2-1/4 cups sugar
8 eggs
1-1/4 cup flour
1/4 cup cocoa powder, unsweetened
1-1/2 teaspoons baking powder
3 teaspoons chai spice mix
pinch of salt

1. Chop chocolate and transfer into the bowl of a standing mixer.
2. Add butter to the chocolate and place the bowl over a pan of simmering water. Stir until chocolate melts and butter is combined.
3. Remove from heat and stir in sugar. Let mixture cool for 10 minutes.
4. Beat in an electric mixer for 3 minutes.
5. Add one egg at a time, mixing for 30 seconds between each
6. Sift the flour, cocoa powder, baking powder, chai spice mix, and a pinch of salt into the mixture and mix until blended.
7. Scoop into cupcake cups and bake at 350 F for 25 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean.


Chai Spice Buttercream Frosting

1 cup (2 sticks) butter
4-5 cups powdered sugar, sifted
1/4 cup milk
2 teaspoons chai spice mix
2 teaspoons minced fresh ginger

1. Beat butter until creamy, scrape bowl.
2. Add 4 cups of sifted powdered sugar, milk, spice mix, and ginger. Beat until combined.
3. Add more powdered sugar as needed to get piping consistency.

Note: Everyone's personal preferences differ. With frosting, the flavor is up to you. If you are unsure of how much of a chai flavor you want, start light on the spices and add a teaspoon at a time until you get to a flavor you like. Same goes for the sugar. It's a matter of taste and what consistency you want to work with. Experiment until you get at what works for you.

Thank you Chockylit for the lovely photos and the recipes.

All this talk about cupcakes reminds me of muffins, which reminds me of muffinfilms. My best friends and I were obsessed with that site all through high school. One friend and I went as far as basing our final assignment in communication technology course on "Muffin Woman". A feminist muffin who saves the day. I wish I still had that video. Also in high school another friend and I made "spinach-feta muffins" in cooking class. I will try and find that recipe another time. It is 2:05am and I have been typing about muffins and cupcakes for far too long. Bonne nuit.

300 year old cemetaries do not scare me

When you are running low on cash, and it is an over-cast dark Saturday afternoon why not spend the day in a 300 year old cemetary? Père Lachaise is the largest cemetary in Paris, hosting some famous graves such as Jim Morrison, Oscar Wilde, Eugene Delacroix, Edith Piaf, Honore de Balzac.... the list goes on. Is it strange that I find myself very relaxed and in a very pleasent mood when I spend a couple hours in this grim place? Maybe it is, but I don't think I am the only one. I went there a couple of times in the summer and I would always find a few people sitting on the benches and reading. I prefer to just walk down the winding paths observing. It is not your average cemetary, it is actually very beautiful and so big that I am scared of getting lost and then being locked in at night.

you like that song, don't you?

Yes, I like all 4 of those songs.
There is something about French 80's music that intrigues me. I have always enjoyed 80's music, but it was never my favourite. But apparently French 80's is my new music preference this month. I'm sure this obsession won't last long.

In other news, Valentin is growing so fast! I didn't see les enfants for almost 2 weeks because they were on vacation, which meant I was also. He is 2yrs and 3months, and is no longer a baby, but a little boy now. He is talking; normally his own made-up language, but occasionally he'll throw in a French word, or repeat me when I say a funny word in English. He likes when I say "bye-bye", and is always repeating that. The other day I was pushing him in his stroller, and he was holding his winnie the pooh stuffed animal, speaking loudly about nothing in particular to the" dou-dou" (French for stuffed toy, or favourite child belonging) as we are walking down the sidewalk. I am crossing the road, and suddenly he throws the animal roughly onto the street and yells loud and proud, "BYE-BYE DOU-DOU!!!!". He also proceeded to remove his little running shoes from his feet 3 times and chuck those on the groud as well during the stroll. I didn't notice until I was a block past. Basically the entire stroll was just me bending down and picking things up. Good thing is super cute.